So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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