I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
