I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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