so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
