She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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