another moral hangover. fuck.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
