you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
