worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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