I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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