I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
