My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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