My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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