i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize