Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You took a bar mat shot.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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