Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
