I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I looked at my own cervix.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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