just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
