new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
