We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
