Sry I called you an 8
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
