He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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