I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i would punch a child for taco bell
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
