so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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