i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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