Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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