This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
