I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
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