the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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