Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
