This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize