What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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