Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
