I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Plan B is the new Plan A
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
