I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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