So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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