no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
