I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
