I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
