HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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