I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
