You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
im holly from the hills drunk
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
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