do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
