I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
