I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
We talked him into tasing himself.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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