so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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