Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
