Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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