You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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