3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Randomize
