And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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